What has happened to me? I was always the skinny one, the lucky one to be able to eat whatever I wanted. I feel so old. I am huge. I have to go buy bigger jeans. My work uniforms don’t fit; didn’t I just get a bigger size last year? I am sooooooo tired all the time, will I ever feel like I can do something besides work and sleep…..Sleep, sleep, do I really ever sleep? My clothes are so tight, I am so uncomfortable all the time. I can’t move.
That was my daily, maybe hourly litany…..I’m so fat. I’m so tired. I’m so old.
18 years ago! Shoot, I don’t even think I’m that old now……what was going on with me!?
I was 200 pounds. I had twin toddlers at home. I was working second shift outside at the airport. I cleaned my kids plates for them, ate what they ate….hot dogs and Mac-n-cheese, crackers and frosting, juice and milk and a lot of Pepsi. A Twix bar and Mountain Dew for break every afternoon. Exercise!? Who had time for that? And for crying out loud, I threw bags for a living, wasn’t that enough physical activity in a day? Well obviously not if I was 75 pounds overweight.
And then it changed.
Just like that.
My journey changed direction.
I was standing in front of the vending machine. A coworker walked into the break room, flush from a quick walk around the airport on his break. “Hey Denise! I’ve got time for one more lap, wanna come with me?” The quarters went back in my pocket and off we went. 15 minutes later I was a little breathless, warm and invigorated.